I’ve learned from experience that a lot of what I was told by seminar leaders turned out to be. . . well, wrong. I realized that some (though not all) trainers oversimplify a process so that it is more marketable. For instance, I had read/heard that I could change any habit in 21 days or 30 days, depending on the trainer—sound familiar? If you have heard these or any other “magic” time frames, they are about as useful as a steering wheel on a dirt bike. In fact, they are worse than that. If you expect to experience a change in behavior in 21 days and nothing happens, it can be very disappointing – make you wonder what you did wrong – lead to guilt and disillusionment.
The truth, in my experience, is that a habit or belief of any kind can be changed in an instant, a week, month, year or perhaps never. The time it takes to alter a habit depends on many factors: your desire to change, your belief in your ability to change, how many and how strong the conflicting old beliefs, and your commitment to diligently work the transformation process, just to list a few. In general, I recommend a healthy level of skepticism when it comes to personal growth trainers—including me. If you are drawn to a philosophy or program, experiment with it, test it out. If it works, great. If not, eject and keep searching. No program fits all, but there is always a way if you know what you want and expect to find it.